HARAAM WEDDING FUNCTIONS AND THE DECEPTION OF BREAKING ‘FAMILY TIES’
My Uncle’s daughter is getting married. He is regarded as the senior member of the family and his family is very close with my family.
They will be having a wedding reception at a hall. Whilst I have informed them that I will not attend this function, and they have accepted this, I have also informed my mother that I will not be attending the Nikah. This she does not accept. Her argument is summarised as follows:
1. There is nothing haraam about a Nikaah where there will be only men in the Masjid; and
2. I will be breaking family ties.
Please advise whether it is permissible to attend the Nikah given the haraam function, and if not, will I be breaking family ties.
Please provide a detailed answer with reasons as I will present this question and the answer to the family. JazakAllah Wassalaam
THE ANSWER OF THE SHARIAH
A Sahaabi had died and Rasulullah (Sallallahu alayhi wasallam) was requested to lead the Janaazah Salaat. However, Rasulullah (Sallallahu alayhi wasallam) refused because the Sahaabi had an unpaid debt. Nabi (Sallallahu alayhi wasallam) instructed someone else to lead the Janaazah Salaat.
Solely on the basis of the unpaid debt, was the Sahaabi deprived of the blessing of his Janaazah Salaat being led by Rasulullah (Sallallahu alayhi wasallam). Rasulullah’s refusal was to portray the evil of unpaid debt. He refused to perform the Janaazah Salaat in order to convey to the people the gravity of the sin of not paying debt.
Now for example, if your brother who, assuming he is a flagrant faasiq, dies and you refuse to lead the Janaazah Salaat or even refuse to be present at his Janaazah Salaat, and for which you will be Islamically justified, then your mother will also argue and say:
1) There is nothing haraam about performing Janaazah Salaat where there will be only men in the Musjid; and
2) You will be breaking family ties.
Understand well that performing Salaat, Fasting, Hajj, Sadqah, Family ties and all acts of ibaadat and virtue are virtuous, valid and acceptable to Allah Ta’ala only if these are executed in complete accord with His Commands. If any aspect of these deeds of virtue is in conflict with the Shariah, then such deeds cease to be acts of Ibaadat. On the contrary the deeds will be invalid and in some instances inspirations of shaitaan.
Allah Ta’ala revealed to Nabi Yusha’ (Alayhis salaam) that He would soon be destroying a city of 100,000 inhabitants. Of these, 60,000 were fussaaq/fujjaar and 40,000 were such pious people (Buzrugs) whose acts of Ibaadat were like the deeds of the Ambiya. Nevertheless, they too would be destroyed. Nabi Yusha’ (Alayhis salaam) was surprised and confused. He supplicated to Allah Ta’ala to explain why would these Buzrugs of such lofty piety also be punished and destroyed along with the villains. Allah Ta’ala responded that these buzrugs had abandoned Amr Bil Ma’roof. By mingling with the community in general, they had become so desensitized that silence and intermingling had become the norm for them despite the flagrant commission of transgression of the masses. They socialized and fraternized with the people. They attended their walimahs, jalsahs and functions in general, hence in terms of Allah’s Logic they all were of the same fussaaq/fujjaar ilk.
The wedding reception in the hall is most certainly accompanied by haraam acts, hence it is haraam. At the time of the nikah in the Musjid, it will be a known fact that after the ceremony, Allah Ta’ala will be insulted by this groom by means of flagrant perpetration of haraam. Thus, this groom, his bride, all all those who assisted in organizing the haraam function, and all the participants will be under the La’nat (Curse) and Ghadhab (Wrath) of Allah Azza Wa Jal every second they will be at the Mal-oon (Accursed) haraam function in the haraam.
The food and whatever else will be devoured at the Mal-oon function will also be Mal-oon and Haraam. In addition, the Imaam who will be performing the nikah in the Musjid and the participant in the ceremony in the Musjid are equal in the sin of blatantly insulting Allah Azza Wa Jal, for they all are fully aware of the fisq and fujoor which will follow the mock ‘holy’ nikah in the Musjid. It is not permissible for the Imaam and the trustees of the Musjid to allow a nikah to be conducted in the Musjid if it will be followed by a haraam function.
Participants in this type of nikah, i.e. one followed by insult to Allah Ta’ala with advertised haraam perpetration, are similar to those who had recently participated in a nikah followed by a marriage according to Hindu rituals of shirk and kufr. Both follow-up acts are haraam although the Hindu shirk one is worse.
Why is your mother able to accept your dissociation from the reception in the hall, but not your refusal to participate in the nikah ceremony? She accepts the former because she believes it is haraam. Despite this belief she finds it plausible to condone the haraam, and further support it. This is a dangerous attitude for Imaan.
When abstention from Janaazah Salaat is permissible on the basis of unpaid debt, despite this not being a sin of fisq and fujoor, then to a far greater degree will it be haraam to attend a nikah in a Musjid when the nikah will be followed by a function which is abhorrent to Allah Ta’ala.
The one who attends the nikah despite being aware of the insult to Allah Ta’ala after the nikah, is in the same category as the one who will be attending the haraam function in the hall.
Shaitaan deceives people with arguments which he adorns with ‘deeni’ flavour. He presents the chimera of ‘family ties’ to trick and mislead people into the commission of flagrant fisq and fujoor. Observance of family ties is haraam if it entails conflict with Allah Ta’ala. Observing of family ties is valid and permissible only if such observance is in conformity with the Shariah. Maintenance of family ties on the basis of haraam, is haraam.
Furthermore, by refraining from the nikah, you will not be breaking family ties. Those who are annoyed by your absence will be the culprits guilty of breaking family ties should they shun you simply because you had not attended the nikah. In this case the flagrant transgressors will be guilty of breaking family ties, not you who will be upholding your ties with Allah Ta’ala by abstaining from insulting Allah Ta’ala with indulgence in haraam. Thus, the argument of breaking family ties which most ignorant people nowadays present to justify participation in haraam functions is satanically adorned with deceptive ‘deeni’ hues which the Qur’aan terms Zukhruful Qawl.
May Allah Ta’ala grant you firmness on the Shariah.
9 Rajab 1440 – 16 March 2019