MISC. WOMEN’S ISSUES

VARIOUS QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS RELATED TO WOMEN FROM THE MAJLIS VOL 25 NO 10

Q. Is it permissible for a wife to take a job outside the home? Can the husband prevent her?
A. It is not permissible for the wife to take a job outside the home even with the permission
of the husband. It is not permissible for her to do any work even from home without the
permission of her husband. The maintenance is the responsibility of the husband. If he provides the maintenance, and he refuses permission for his wife to work and earn even from home, then it will not be permissible for her to undertake any job even from within the precincts of the home. The husband is under Shar’i obligation to prohibit and prevent his wife from leaving the house to work or to participate in any kind of function.

Q. My husband works in an office among females who are immodestly dressed. He says that he keeps his eyes cast down. He also says that Muslim doctors and even Ulama work with women. What is the Shariah’s law in this regard?
A. The doctors and even Ulama who do not observe proper Hijaab and who work with women are not the Shariah. Their activities and their mingling with women in their professions and occupations may not be presented as a valid basis. The only basis is the Shariah, not the practices of people even if they are great Ulama. If their practices are in conflict with the Shariah, it will remain haraam and not become halaal because they happen to be ‘great’ Ulama. It is not proper and not permissible for a Muslim male doctor to attend to female patients. He should divert them to female doctors. Only if there is a valid reason upheld by the Shariah may a male doctor attend to a female and vice versa. There are numerous non-Muslim female
doctors who can handle Muslim female patients. A Muslim doctor is not supposed to work in a hospital where he has to incumbently interact with females. Thus, their actions are not Islamic proofs for permissibility.
Your husband should himself make a sincere attempt to work elsewhere where he will not be in the company of women. He is bound to fall into the pit of zina. Shaitaan and the Nafs are deceiving him.


Q. Is it permissible to donate human milk?
A. Human breast milk is haraam. Breast milk is only halaal for under two year old infants. Donating or selling human milk or any part of the human body is haraam.

Q. Will a woman be a faasiq if she does not wear niqaab?
A. A woman who does not wear Niqaab in public is worse than a faasiqah. She is a faajirah (immoral).

Q. Will the wife be disobedient if she refuses to submit to her husband’s demand for oral sex?
A. The one who makes such a filthy satanic demand is worse than a pig. Oral or shaitaan sex is haraam. The wife should not submit to the swine-filth of the husband. She will not be disobedient. She is under Shar’i obligation to refuse the haraam instructions and haraam lusts of her husband. How can a human being who is termed Ashraful Makhluqaat (The Noblest of Creation) descend into such depths of swine-inequity?

Q. Is marriage to a Salafi girl valid?
A. Marriage with a Salafi girl is valid just as marriage with a Muslim prostitute is valid. However, such a marriage will be full of misery, hence inadvisable. There will be no compatibility and the marriage is likely
to break down and end in divorce. The Deeni differences and conflicts between Salafis and the Muqallideen of the Math-habs constitute an unbridgeable chasm.

Q. Does the period of breastfeeding differ for boys and girls?
A. The period of breastfeeding is two years for both boys and girls.


Q. My mother is extremely sick and complains a lot. What advice can I give her?
A. Be of service to her to the best of your ability. Tell her that it comes in the Hadith that sickness is a purifier. It cleanses us from all our sins provided that we do not complain. Complaining will not cure the sickness. On the contrary the sickness will become worse. Sickness is also a ni’mat (favour) of Allah Ta’ala. He purifies us here on earth with sicknesses and other difficulties so that we can enter Jannat fully purified. Advise your mother to keep her tongue constantly engaged in Thikrullaah. Maut can come at any moment. Therefore, the tongue should always be engaged in some Thikr to ensure departure from this dunya with
the Kalimah on the tongue.


Q. Is imitation jewellery permissible?
A. Imitation jewellery is permissible for women except rings. Rings must be of either gold or silver.

Q. Is it proper for a man to marry a second wife only for the sake of his lust?
A. Allah Ta’ala permits a man to marry four women. As far as ‘lust’ is concerned, everyone marries to satisfy his/her lust. The primary motive for marrying even one wife is to gratify lust. Initially people marry only to satisfy lust even if only one wife is taken. Allah Ta’ala has created lust in people, hence He is aware that men require more than one wife to satisfy their lust lawfully. Never voice yourself against any Law of Allah Ta’ala. Recite Istighfaar and make Taubah.


Q. Why is it not permissible for women to attend walimahs. During the time of Rasulullah (Sallallahu alayhi wasallam), they would go to walimahs.
A. Just as it is not permissible for women to attend the Musjid even if there are separate entrances, so too is it forbidden for women to attend ‘walimahs’ nowadays. Furthermore, the ‘walimahs’ nowadays are farcical and bid’ah. In fact, it is not permissible for even men to attend the reception organized by the girl’s parents on the day of the Nikah. Such a reception is not the walimah. Women used to attend the Musjid for Salaat during the age of Rasulullah (Sallallahu alayhi wasallam). However, this was unanimously banned later by the Sahaabah.
The same applies to walimahs and to all other merrymaking functions.

Q. How many holes may a lady pierce in her ears?
A. A lady may pierce her ears only with one hole in each ear. More than one is the style of the kuffaar.

Q. My husband has cheated on me. He has struck up adulterous relationships. My heart is broken. I don’t know what to do. My health is suffering. I want to run away. Please give me some advice.
A. Countless women are undergoing the same heart-breaking problems. When men lack Taqwa, they conduct themselves like atheists. They really do not believe that Allah Ta’ala is seeing them and that the Recording
Angels are writing their misdeeds. However, do understand well that your broken heart is a wonderful treasure by Allah Ta’ala. Allah Ta’ala, in His Own Words, said to Rasulullah (Sallallahu alayhi wasallam):
“I am with every broken heart.” Your grief will not be in vain. You will receive immense rewards for patiently bearing the grief. Focus more on Allah Ta’ala. Do not ruin your health on account of the shenanigans of your husband. Maintain your health and use it to gain nearness to Allah Ta’ala. Increase ibaadat. Life on earth is short. It is full of trials. May Allah Ta’ala grant you strength and steadfastness on the Deen. May Allah Ta’ala guide your husband and protect you.

Q. A man has two wives. The one wife lives with him while the other wife lives in her own house about 100 kilometres away. This wife demands equal nights. What is the Shariah’s rule?
A. In the scenario mentioned by you, if the wife who lives 100 kilometres away desires equal nights, then she has to reside in a house procured for her by her husband in the town where he lives. She cannot demand equal nights living in her own house 100 km from her husband.

Q. I do not allow my children to visit their grandparents – my parents and my wife’s parents.
They have televisions, and in general they do not observe the rules of the Shariah such as purdah, mushtabah / haraam food, etc. They are accusing me of breaking family ties. Am I breaking family ties?
A. In fact, it is not permissible to send your children to relatives who are not strict on the Deen. Refraining from sending the children does not mean that you are severing family ties. It is the Waajib obligation of parents to ensure that the Akhlaaq of their children are not compromised by relatives. Nowadays, the safest is to stay at home, and not to visit even relatives. We are trapped in an era of fitnah and fasaad. A home where the Deen is observed is a holy sanctuary visited by the Malaaikah of Rahmat. On the other hand, houses such as the homes of your parents are haunts for the shayaateen. These people lack the haziest idea of the meaning of family ties and what constitutes disruption of breaking of family ties. Furthermore, it is haraam to uphold
‘family ties’ when in conflict with the Shariah.

Q. Is there a special thikr or amal for anxiety and depression? When my evil past comes to mind, I develop anxiety and go into depression.
A. When anxiety develops, do not brood on the past. Do not entertain the thought which is the cause for the anxiety. Instead, lapse into Thikrullah. Perform two raka’ts Nafl and engage in Thikrullah. Shaitaan tries to derail a person by causing anxiety in this manner. A Mu’min equipped with the weapon of Thikr does not suffer depression. Anxiety is an assault of shaitaan, and its antidote is Thikrullah. Rasulullah (Sallallahu alayhi wasallam) said: “Shaitaan sits glued on the heart of man. When he (man) makes thikr, shaitaan
flees. When he (man) is oblivious (ghaafil), shaitaan casts his waswasah.”

Q. I have found out that my husband is conducting relationships with women via his cell phone. He refuses to give me the password. What should I do?
A. 99% of the men of this age, including molvis and sheikhs, are involved in cellphone zina and pornography. There is nothing you will be able to do in these circumstances. Men and women are drowning in deluges of moral filth – zina and porno – of the cellphone. Little children are also addicted to this device of shaitaan. The
entire Ummah across the board, is buffeted madly in this whirlpool of cellphone filth. People no longer have Imaan. They have become atheists. They are in entirety bereft of any concept of Allah’s Omnipresence. They
have become munaafiqs. Whilst they blabber with their mouths about the Recording Angels, they sin flagrantly in front of these Malaaikah and with Allah Ta’ala looking at them. But since they do not really believe in the Presence of Allah Ta’ala and His Malaaikah, they sin recklessly. You can only constantly offer good advice to your husband and adopt Sabr. If you are unable to bear his evil abuse with patience then your marriage will end. Thus, your choice is between Sabr and Talaaq.
Q. The separation between a husband and wife was in terms of Khula’. Is it correct that the Iddat of this woman is 30 days?
A. The Iddat of a woman whether separated by Talaaq or Khula is the same. It is three haidh periods if not pregnant. If pregnant, it ends with the delivery of the child.

oral sex

Oral sex between a husband and wife is considered as Makruh Tahrimi by the jurists, since there is strong possibility that by ejaculation, Mazi (semen) comes out and enters the mouth of the partner. There is consensus amongst the Fuqahaa that Mazi is Najis (impure).

ORAL SEX
Man has been created as a bearer of high and noble attributes. In him he mirrors the attributes of divinity (Sifaat-e-Ilaahiyya) such as life, knowledge, power, will, sight, hearing, speech, love, etc. In the authoritative Tafseer of the aforementioned Aayat, it is said that Insaan (man) has been adorned with the Noor of Aql (the light of intelligence). This celestial faculty of intelligence creates in Insaan the capacity for the manifestation of the lofty and divine attributes of Allah Taãla. By virtue of the Noor of Aql man becomes incandescent by being a mirror for these lofty attributes and manifestation (Tajalliyaat-e-Zilliyah and Sifaat-e-Zaatiyyah). As a direct consequence of this lofty pedestal which Insaan occupies in the Divine Scheme, the mantle of Khilaafah (vicegerency) has been conferred on him. Stating this fact, the Qurãn declares: ‘Verily I shall be creating on earth a Khaleefah.’ In the Tafseer of the Aayat mentioned at the beginning, it is also said that in relation to all the species of life, man has been endowed with the most beautiful form. All other animals have been created in a lowly form with their heads downwards. Their faces constantly pointing downwards to the earth indicate their low rank in relation to man. In contrast, man has been created upright and he eats his food by means of raising it with his hands unlike the lowly beasts with faces downwards. HIS DEBASEMENT In the Tafseer of the Aayat, it is said that when man willingly destroys his natural ability to progress to the pedestals of elevation, he degenerates and falls from his lofty mansion. He then falls to levels lower than the level of dogs, pigs and even Shayaateen. SUPERIORITY According to the authentic Tafaseer, prior to the creation of Aadam (Álayhis salaam); the Malaaikah (angels) entertained the opinion that Allah Taãla will not create any being superior to them. Allah Taãla negates this opinion of the Malaaikah by creating Aadam (Álayhis salaam) and making him a manifestation of divine attributes. To illustrate Insaan’s superiority over all species of creation, Allah Taãla commanded the Malaaikah to make Sajdah (prostration) to him (Nabi Aadam (Álayhis salaam). The superiority of man is well emphasized by the statement of Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Álayhi Wasallam): ‘Allah created Aadam in His (Allah’s) form.’ Insha Allah, this Hadith will be explained in greater detail in some future issue of ‘the Majlis’. Here it is sufficient to mention the interpretation of the authorities intelligence, sight, hearing, etc. These lofty attributes are located in that part of the human body called head. It is for this reason that Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Álayhi Wasallam) forbade striking or slapping the face of any human being or even an animal. In the Tafseer of the Qurãnic Aayat which permits husbands to beat wives in cases of necessity, it is said: ‘The face shall not be slapped’. Explaining the reason for the prohibition of slapping the face, Imaam Nawawi (RA) says in his Sharhul Muslim, ‘Because the face is the embodiment of man’s beauty in addition to it being of sublime nature.’ THE LATAA-IF-E-SITTAH In man there are six metaphysical or non-material or spiritual faculties known as the Lataa-if-e-sittah. Two of these lofty faculties, viz. Lateefah Khaafi and Lateefah Akhfa are located in the head. The Lateefah Akhfah is located in the centre of the brain while the location of Lateefah Khafi is between the eyebrows. The functions of these faculties are the highest states of reflection and contemplation, progressing from the high state of Fana to Fanul Fana. These are spiritual or Roohani stages which shall not be discussed in this article. PATHWAY FOR QURÃN In the Ahaadith, the following narration appears. ‘Verily, your mouths are pathways of the Qurãn, therefore purify your mouths with Miswaak’. The Makhaarij or places from whence Qurãnic huroof (letters) emanate are located in the mouth. The high Ibaadat of Tilaawat of the Qurãn shareef is affected via the mouth; hence the Hadith describes the mouth as the ‘pathway of the Qurãn’. Since it is, literally speaking, the channel for the recitation of the Qurãn shareef, Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Álayhi Wasallam) emphasized much the maintenance of its purity. The emphasis on the purity of the mouth could be gauged from the many times Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Álayhi Wasallam) would use the Miswaak everyday to clean his mouth. The practice of Miswaak is strongly stressed by the Shariáh. In one Hadith, Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Álayhi Wasallam) said, ‘When the servant of Allah uses the Miswaak and then performs Salaat, an angel stands behind him, listening attentively to the recitation of the Qurãn. The angel draws closer and closer to the reciter and places his mouth on the mouth of the reciter. Thus every word emanating from the mouth of the Musalli enters the angel’s mouth. Therefore, maintain your mouth pure and clean for the Qurãn. ZIKRULLAH The actual purpose underlying the creation of man is Zikrullah or the remembrance of Allah Taãla. Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Álayhi Wasallam) ordered Muslims to maintain their tongues fresh with the Zikr of Allah Taãla. The facts mentioned above will indicate that Insaan is Ashraful Makhlukaat (the noblest of creation) and the noblest part of his body is his head which is the location for lofty faculties and attributes which earn for him the designation of ‘the form of Allah’. In order that he maintains his lofty rank and progresses continuously towards loftier mansions and closer Divine Proximity, it is essential that man exercises restraint over his physical and animal qualities. If he fails in this respect, he will descend to a level below the lowly beasts. Allah Taãla has endowed man with intelligence, will-power and shame. He must employ these attributes to subdue his animal and carnal desires and refrain from indulgence in the excesses of lust. If he fails in this achievement he will annihilate himself spiritually and degenerate to sub-animal levels. The sublimity of Islam is of such a lofty degree that it exhorts its adherence to adopt dignity, deportment and propriety in even sexual relationship. Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Álayhi Wasallam) advised his Ummah to abstain from total nudity when indulging in sex and not to behave ‘like asses’. Since Islam is a culture of transcendental values calculated to ensure maximum remembrance of Allah Taãla, a Muslim should not debase himself to a sub-animal level by resorting to the vile practice of oral sex. The mouth of Insaan is the pathway of the Qurãn, his tongue has been commanded to remain fresh with Zikrullah; his mouth is situated in the noblest part of his body; the functions of his mouth are noble and lofty; his mouth is a passageway for transference of the recited Qurãn into the mouth of the listening angel. He cannot, therefore, debase and dishonor himself so disgracefully by resorting to the revolting practice of oral sex. A Muslim should not dishonor that head and face which the Shariáh of Islam commands to be honored. Allah Taãla honored the human head with noble qualities, the highest being the Noor of Aql, but man debases that lofty part of his body by indulging in an act of bestiality not even committed by the lowly beasts. It does not behoove man in general and a Muslim in particular to degrade himself in this manner. The Mu’min’s link with Allah Taãla is so strong or ought to be so strong that the Shariáh has prescribed a particular Duá to be recited even when a man approaches his wife for sexual relations. Even at the moment of reaching climax and ejaculation, the Muslim is required to read in his mind (without moving the lips) a special Duá so that he remains protected from any Shaitaani interference. We learn from the Hadith of Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Álayhi Wasallam) that Shaytaan attempts to interfere with man even while he indulges in lawful sex, hence the wording of the special Duá for this occasion is: ‘O Allah! Protect us from Shaytaan and protect the offspring you grant us from Shaytaan’. Allah Taãla has honored man highly, hence the Qurãn says, ‘Verily, we have honored the sons of Aadam.’ He is therefore not allowed to debase himself with the bestial acts which even the lowly beasts do not commit. The mouth is an honored part of the physical body. It is not a receptacle of impurity. The Shariáh emphasizes the maintenance of its purity. Even in the developing fetus, Allah Taãla has arranged for the maintenance of the purity of the mouth. The umbilical cord connects the developing embryo to its mother. It is the passageway in which exchange of nutrient and waste materials with the circulatory system of the mother takes place. In man the umbilical cord arises at the navel below which is the location of the rebellious Nafs which reduces man to sub-animal levels if not restrained. Why does Allah Taãla not create the fetus with the umbilical cord attached to its mouth so that its nutrition reaches it in the normal way, viz. via the mouth? Right until the very last moments prior to its emergence into the external world, the baby’s nutrition is via the umbilical cord. Immediately on reaching the outside world its nourishment reaches it from the mouth. Since the umbilical cord is also the passageway for impure waste matter, its connection is near to the location of the lowly nafs. The mouth has thus been guarded against impurities. The facts presented in this article should be sufficient to convey to Muslims that their Imaan and the spirit of the teachings of Islam do not permit them to grovel in the dregs of debasement and perpetrate moral injustice by utilizing the mouth for deriving sexual pleasure. This is not the function of the mouth. It is a misappropriation of an amaanat (trust). All parts of the body are Amaanat which have to be utilized in accordance with the instructions of Allah Taãla. Such contamination and moral pollution as entailed by oral sex are most unbecoming the dignity and rank of man, especially if the Insaan appears to be a follower of the illustrious Shariáh of Muhammad (Sallallaahu Álayhi Wasallam). Allah Taãla states in the Noble Qurãn, ‘Verily, Allah loves those who purify themselves.’ Extracted from ‘The Majlis’ Vol. 6 No. 8