Bismillahir Rahmaanir Raheem
As a Madrasah teacher, teaching high-school girls and university students, the challenges they face or get caught up in are of great and grave concern. (Other teachers who are teaching in different Makaatib will attest to the same issues.)
Many of the students attend private schools. These are the elite schools in KZN. Over the years, mothers have made it clear to me that they want the best secular education for their children and won’t consider anything less than the best private schools or even boarding schools.
The following are some of the incidents brought to my attention, of happenings in these private and renowned schools, direct from the students, mothers or teachers.
1.) A number of students have doubts believing in Allah, since Darwin’s theory of evolution and the big bang theory are expounded in their classes.
One student said that they are not allowed to bring up the word ‘God’ or religion, because their teacher is an atheist. (Nor are they allowed to bring up an issue like Palestine or mention the word, ‘Palestine’)
They have asked me to explain the existence of Allah, as they have misgivings and are not sure anymore.
They have Muslim names, say they are Muslims to keep their parents comfortable, but their minds are 100% secular. They are thus not keen to practise on the teachings of Islam.
Parents naively believe that the environment and education will not affect their children’s Deen; in reality it is destroying their Deen.
2.) An all-girls’ school had a principal, for many years, who identified herself as a lesbian. It was no secret. She left such a legacy in the school that a number of the students now also identify themselves as lesbians.
Muslim mothers and the students themselves were indifferent to this. They described her as a good principal, considerate and accommodating. There was no concern that the one in charge of their daughters was involved in such immoral conduct or would influence them to the same way of life.
Now we have Muslim girls coming out as lesbians and they are already in relationships with other girls. They say that their parents know nothing of their tendencies and inclinations, and don’t want them to find out. If not lesbian, many ‘Muslim’ girls fully support those who are. (The same scenario is found amongst boys).
3.) The LGBTQ+ community has grown so much at the schools, that will shock many parents. A lot of promotion and time is being spent to “educate” students of these ‘rights’.
When some of these ‘Muslim’ girls are asked about it, they treat the topic as a joke and laugh about these happenings. They consider these as ‘new norms’ and acceptable. Otherwise, we have some ‘Muslim’ students who argue regarding LGBTQ. These students strongly advocate that as Muslims, we have to accept the LGBTQ, support and sympathise with them.
…What is left of a person’s Imaan when he or she considers permissible what Allah has declared as prohibited?
And if any student, at these schools, does not toe the line and accept, she is targeted and labelled homophobic. She is considered biased, is snubbed and even reported to teachers.
4.) Many Muslim girls (and boys) are caught up in zina (fornication) and they brazenly make it known. It is out of control. One student said to me that in her click of 8 Muslim girls, 5 have already lost their chastity. These are high-school girls. The parents are either blissfully unaware or are themselves caught up in the same vice of adultery. …Married Muslim women have made known their illicit relationships and even that of their spouses. Very sadly, this is the kind of bad example some of the children have today, in their parents.
On the other hand, there are those children who fall into depression and wish to end their lives when they find out about their parents’ promiscuity or “double lives”. One student mentioned that she was contemplating suicide because both her mother and father were involved in adulterous relationships. This was the key factor of her depression and it was what prompted suicide.
5.) Whilst it is common for unmarried non-Muslim girls to fall pregnant or have abortions during their school/university years, the same is becoming common amongst our Muslim girls. (The company you keep…)
6.) In these institutes, the girls are coached to be feminists. There are educators who promote and push the agenda of feminism, freedom, independence and fighting for one’s “rights”. As a result, students wrongly see Islam as repressive. Their questions and ideas indicate this. Many don’t want to wear a scarf, let alone dress modestly or live according to Islamic teachings because of the influence of feminist “ideals”.
(Alhamdulillah, Islam has already honoured women with great rights, respect and honour.)
7.) A Muslim student was so influenced by her school ‘friends’ at one of the most prestigious private schools in SA, that she became a call girl. She began to earn money through sex chats. Her mother had insisted she attend the school, arguing that her daughter has to have the best secular education.
…If the end-product is a prostitute, I think we can all agree that there is a need to reassess our priorities.
8.) Although called an ‘all girls schools’, male teachers are employed. For many of these schools, the uniform is a short skirt and shirt. But there is no worry from the parents. It really does not matter to most of them that there are male teachers or lesbians or atheists teaching their daughters. Being an all-girl’s school with a high level of education seems to make everything ‘right’?
9.) One mother declared that she sends her daughter to a private Christian school for the “best secular education”, and mentioned that her young daughter finds the priest to be “very compassionate” towards her.
…Can we be so naïve?
Another Muslim mother shared that her daughter spent the week-end away on a school excursion, but said she was happy in the knowledge that her daughter was ‘safe’ in the guardianship of a priest. (?)
…If this does not create uneasiness and worry in a mother, you are surely living in a bubble.
10.) Students attending these schools/institutes have said that some of their friends – girls and boys – have left Islam. Their parents don’t know. Drugs, drinking, pornography, satanism, homosexuality, etc. are rife.
This is just the tip of the iceberg. Some incidents are just too shameful to mention; not only in the KZN province and South Africa, in schools for boys and girls, at primary and secondary levels and universities; it is a global pandemic. Even our Muslim schools are not free from these evils. The problems are obviously exacerbated when children are given access to Tiktok, YouTube, Netflix and other social media platforms.
So My Message to Parents is:
If you have placed your daughter/son in such an environment, you own this.
If they fall into immoral conduct and Kufr, you carry this burden.
Say what you like, but if you enrolled them in these schools and institutes, are paying their fees and transporting them to and fro, day in and day out, the blame is squarely on you.
You can throw out all kinds of criticism and excuses in response to this, to justify your choice, it is not going to change the facts on the ground. You can save your reasons and excuses for the Day of Judgement, but will they carry weight in the Court of Allah?
You can continue to live in denial, but it won’t change reality. You cannot foolishly plead ignorance before Allah.
Sending them to Madrasah for 1 hour or 2 hours to assuage your conscience, but eagerly and readily sacrificing Madrasah for extra-curricular activities, tuition, etc. shows where your loyalties lie. When they are spending 7 hours+, Monday to Friday (online or onsite), with secularists, feminists, modernists, lesbians, gays and others (not forgetting the amount of time spent on social media), then surely that influence will be greater than a few hours spent in Madrasah, half-heartedly. …Educate yourself on what secularism is. Because if any education distances us from Allah, it certainly is the worst and the poorest education; not the best.
You can decide:
If you still want the most elite schools and best secular education, and are happy with the end result, even if it is the fire of hell, all at your expense, then of course that is your bad decision.
If you have concern for your children’s Imaan, then step out of the rivalry game and competition circles. We are not here to boost our egos and boast our wealth and our worldly status.
You may not like the reminder, but we are the slaves of Allah. We are here, in this world, to worship Him and prepare for the Hereafter. This world is not the be-all and end-all. We have to return to Allah.
You have been given your child as a trust from Allah. Sending your daughter/son to such a school, college or university environment, with the kind of sins that are glorified there, is a huge compromise on Deeni principles, for which you will be accountable on the Day of Judgement.
For yours and your daughter’s/son’s Imaan and salvation, take them out