Democracy: Is the Population Responsible for Killing Muslims?

By Hud Lesprit -July 4, 2022

MUSLIM SKEPTIC

It has become a recurrent trend where Muslims all over the World are deemed collectively responsible for terrorist attacks which have unfortunately lead to the deaths of civilians in the West.
When the pundits are mature enough to recognize that most Muslims have nothing to do with these killings, they instead blame Islam, alleging the religion to be the root cause of these violent transgressions.
This is just a petty attempt to try and seem tolerant while still blaming all Muslims. Undoubtedly, no true Muslim would say that he condemns Islam. So according to such a claim, this would make all Muslims moral allies to terrorists.
What is the difference, then, between blaming Islam and blaming Muslims?
RELATED: French Politician: Muslim Terrorism Happens Very Conveniently Before Elections
Now, let me first be very clear in stating that we condemn the actions of terrorist extremist groups and that they do not represent the true beliefs, laws, and teachings of Islam. They are shady individuals, criminals, often have questionable ties to various intelligence agencies, and are not known in the Muslim community for their knowledge or steadfastness. And often their Islam can even be doubted.
That being said, let us now talk about the Islamophobes that use this line of reasoning. 
These hypocrites quickly label all Muslims as belligerents, when they themselves are not willing to acknowledge the blood on their hands for their active role in the killing of millions of Muslims.
Nobody wants to take on the blame for the devastating crimes committed by democratic governments throughout the Muslim world.
Bush killed millions of Iraqis?
They will tell you:
“It is not my fault! He’s the one that did it, not me!”
But in a democracy, isn’t the head of state the representative of the population? One assumes power in such a system by the majority of the voters voting him into office. And those who did not vote for him still endorse the system which he used to get elected. They also recognize his legitimacy in representing them as the elected leader of their country.
RELATED: Why There Is No Such Thing as a Democracy in the Modern World
How then can anyone escape the logical conclusion that, when Bush commanded the killing of millions of Iraqis, every defender of democracy within the USA is also accountable?
They want Muslims to collectively assume the blame for 9/11, but who voted for Osama bin Laden?
Who voted for Cherif and Said Kouachi, or the murderers of Charlie Hebdo?
Who voted for Omar Mateen before he killed dozens of people in Orlando?
Muslims certainly didn’t. All Muslims of sound mind know that these individuals strayed far from the true beliefs, laws and teachings of Islam, and we would never accept these criminals as our representatives.
RELATED: Maryam Petronin: The Ex-Hostage Macron Doesn’t Want You To Know About
Meanwhile, most of the killings against Muslims in the last century have been perpetrated by elected officials who were chosen and appointed by the population. And the citizens are to blame according to the principles of democracy.
Certainly, most Western people do not want to be seen as culpable for the crimes of their governments, much like Muslims around the world do not want to be held accountable for the crimes of random terrorists. Unfortunately, most Western people are not aware of the crimes their governments commit due to the brainwashing they receive at the hands of the mainstream media.
But, as we have seen, Muslims have far more grounds to deny this accountability. It seems logical that, for Westerners to be able to deny accountability, they would have to renounce their governments and claim that they are not true representatives of the will of the people. Maybe they could renounce the concept of democracy as a whole and admit its deep flaws.
Until Westerners renounce the liberal philosophy underlying their bloodthirsty governments, they are in no position to criticize Muslims or Islam.

The Influence of Television

The Influence of Television

This article should be regarded as advice specifically for the Munaafiq, Faajir, Faasiq RIJS (FILTH) molvis who are blatantly, brazenly and most flagrantly committing KUFR by selling their souls to Iblees who has urinated into their brains to become television actors. Furthermore, the arch mudhil, Taqi Usmaani is the prime Agent of Iblees in this Jahannami saga. Purely on the instruction and influence of Iblees did Mr.Taqi open up the door for this television fitnah with His stupid, haraam halaalizing of pictography.

by Hazrat Maulana Yunus Patel Saheb (rahmatullah alayh)

One of the many sunnats of the Ambiyaa (‘alaihimus Salaam) is that of Hayaa (shame and modesty), a quality which is sorely missing in the lives of the majority of Muslims today and which should otherwise be an outstanding characteristic and feature of all Muslims, whether married or un-married.

Television is such an evil that if our society only understood its reality, then they would find no excuse to watch. Its spiritual harm is that it takes away the hayaa and shame of our men, women and children.

The content of most television programmes is nothing but immodesty and indecency, which invites nothing but immodesty and indecency – into our homes, into our lives and the lives of our children.

However, this truth and reality seems to just pass over the understanding of even those Muslims who have some link with Deen.

Many are regular with Salaah, they are seen in the Musjid, they are wearing the garb of the pious and yet they will be the ones to present flimsy and feeble excuses to view television programmes.

Let us consider this situation of sin from the following view – which Alhamdulillah, has been a means of many getting rid of the television.

If a person has to knock on your door and tell you : ‘I would like to use your lounge to commit adultery.’

Or a group of some friends have to request you : ‘We would like to use your home to gamble and enjoy our liquor.’ Or a group of youngsters have to tell you : ‘We have chosen your home as a venue for our partying, dancing, drug-taking and fornicating.’ Or a Christian family has to request you : ‘We would like to use your home as a venue for our church ceremony : The marriage of our daughter as well as the baptism of our grandchild.

We have already obtained the consent of one of our priests.’ Or some idol-worshippers have to suggest : ‘We would like to carry out some of our religious rites in your home. We would like to bring our idols also. You are more than welcome to observe or participate in our rites. ’

Many Muslims, on hearing such requests, will get very angry; will express disgust – if not swear and curse such suggestions.

However, these very same Muslims who will even resort to swearing and cursing such proposals, invite into their homes all of the above by the switch of the television, by hiring English and Hindi films and DVDs and downloading porn and other films from the Internet. There is so much of adultery, partying and other filth that we seem to just welcome into our homes – least realizing the consequences.

Just to give you one example and this is but the tip of the iceberg – and it is said with the intention of removing the blindfold that most parents wear :

A father of four children mentioned to me that he had got rid of his television and he thereafter explained why.

He said that late one night he heard strange noises from his children’s room. On opening the door of their room, he found their television switched on.

This is our concept of modesty , parents must have their own television, to view all kinds of filthy programmes in their privacy, and children must have their own television to view all kinds of indecency in their privacy (Na-uzu Billah).

The father mentioned that there were dirty and obscene scenes of naked people on the television screen. He mentioned that it was filthy and that it shocked him; but what had him even more shaken was that his children were all undressed, engaging in the same kind of indecent acts.

They were imitating the pornography they were viewing. He said himself, that until then he had not considered the harm of television. It took this kind of incident to wake him up. This is just one example of so many. Do we wish to face something similar ?

Do we care to even know what our sons and daughters are doing in the secrecy of their rooms ? The fact that many demand that no one ‘invade’ their space and privacy to the extent of having ‘No Entry’ signs on their doors, should have parents a little more than worried especially if they are viewing television and are surfing the net or have free access with cell phones.

Many have written, that after watching certain films or programmes, the desire came strongly into their hearts to take drugs, drink liquor, murder their parents, indulge in homosexuality, engage in adulterous relationships, commit suicide, rape, and so much else – and many of them do so.

Moreover, with sins like television and evil, lustful glancing, Allah Ta’ala removes the love between husband and wife and even ones children become disobedient.

There are many husbands who entertain thoughts of and fantasize of other women when with their wives. And they will when they are watching different actresses and television presenters.

Many wives are guilty of the same infidelity having seen or socialized with ghair-mahareem. Many women are so infatuated and obsessed with some soccer player or cricket player that they become dissatisfied with their husbands, and spend their time fantasizing.

Had the person not viewed all those ghair-mahareem (impermissible women) on the television screen and computer screen, and had lowered his gaze in real life situations, then he would not have desired that which he cannot have, and there would not have been dissatisfaction with his (or her) spouse.

Moreover we complain that there is no barkat in our homes; there is no barkat in our wealth; there is no barkat in our time. Our children are rebellious. The husband is having an extra-marital relationship. The daughter has accepted Christianity. The son is on drugs and the list of complaints does not end.

Then who is to blame except the one who brought all of this Haraam into the home by purchasing the television and exposing the family to so much of sin.

Great ‘Ulama became Bay’at upon the hands of Maulana Hakeem Fakhrudeen (Rahmatullah ‘alaih). He mentioned that there was a time, that with the rising and setting of the sun, he saw nothing but noor in Surat.

The atmosphere was one of noor. The day commenced with Salaah, Tilawat, Zikrullah.

After the cinemas and television and videos flooded Surat, there was nothing but ‘zulmat’ (darkness).

With the distraction of such entertainment, Ibaadah becomes a forgotten duty.

One Wali of Allah Ta’ala, on visiting a home, mentioned that he perceived the sin of Zina (adultery) from the walls of that home. He was able to recognize this due to the purity of his heart. The residents of that home were not indulging in adultery but they were watching the sin on television.

When fire burns against a white wall, it blackens the wall. The Ahle-Dil (pious people), with their purified hearts, see the fire of sins which has burnt and blackened the white hearts of the Muslims.

Would that we take lesson and take measures to protect ourselves and our children.

22 Zul Qa’dh 1443 – 23 June 2022

DEENI STUDENT WITH MUSICAL VIDEO ON HIS WHATSAPP AND FINANCIALLY INDEPENDENT ULAMA

Q. There’s a student who is studying full time at a Darul Uloom. He has Whatsapp, a social media platform. On his WhatsApp status you can add “your status” and add things like videos or pictures etc. He has a musical video thereon. Should such a student remain at a Darul Uloom?
A. The student to whom you have referred, follows in the footsteps of shaitaan. It is haraam to impart higher Islamic Knowledge to such agents of Iblees. Rasulullah (Sallallahu alayhi wasallam) said:
“He who imparts Ilm (higher Ilm) to an unfit one is like the one who garlands pigs with diamonds, pearls and gold.”
You should pass the information to the Principal of the Darul Uloom, even if you do so anonymously. Give the details of the student. Today, he is not an exception. This type of immoral behaviour is the norm of most Madrasah students. That is why the Darul Ulooms are churning out a mass of molvis who become the Ulama-e-Soo’.


Q. Some ulama say that it is necessary for ulama to be financially independent so that they can speak the haq and not be subjugated to the trustees. However other ulama say that ulama should not work in the corporate world because it diminishes the roohaniyat and the love of the world enters the aalim’s heart due to which he loses focus on ilm. Many ulama who were teaching and working at the same time, when they had to choose between the two, they chose the corporate world because of the high pay and so forth. In light of the above, what should an aalim do?
A. If an Aalim or even a non-Aalim has Taqwa he will know what to do when in a conflict between the Deen and the dunya. He will choose the Deen and kick away the dunya. Proclamation of the Haqq does not depend on finance. The molvis who are subjugated by the trustees are worse than the trustees. Such molvis do not believe that Allah Ta’ala is the Raaziq even if they acknowledge with their mouths. A molvi who conceals the Haqq or who interprets it to suit the trustees and the wealthy, deserves to be ‘subjugated’. He is a traitor to the Deen.
Trustees are able to control and dictate only mercenary molvis. An Aalim of the Haqq will never barter away his Imaan for the wages the fussaaq trustees pay. A molvi who has no concern for the Haqq and whose objective is worldly benefit will not hesitate to behave like a Munaafiq. He will misinterpret, distort and conceal the Haqq. Such a molvi befits humiliation at the hands of the fussaaq trustees who have employed him for their own evil designs. He is not an Aalim. He is a mercenary molvi for who fussaaq trustees are befitting.

Facebook knows Instagram is harmful to teens especially teen girls: WSJ

Social Media

Documents seen by The Wall Street Journal show that Facebook knows Instagram is toxic for young girls, which strays from the tech giant’s public position on the matter.

By Al Jazeera Staff14 Sep 2021For the last three years, Facebook has studied how its Instagram photo-sharing app affects the mental health of its millions of young users, and the firm’s researchers have repeatedly found that Instagram is toxic to a sizable percentage of them, particularly teenage girls, according to internal Facebook documents obtained by The Wall Street Journal.

“We make body image issues worse for one in three teen girls,” said one slide from a 2019 presentation by researchers that was posted to Facebook’s internal message board and viewed by the WSJ.

“Teens blame Instagram for increases in the rate of anxiety and depression,” said another slide seen by the WSJ. “This reaction was unprompted and consistent across all groups.”

The Instagram documents are part of a trove of internal Facebook communications reviewed by the WSJ, and show that Facebook has made minimal effort to address these issues and actually minimises them to the public.

As part of a series entitled “The Facebook Files”, the WSJ on Monday reported (paywall) that internal Facebook documents revealed that the social media company has built a system that exempts high-profile users such as politicians, celebrities and journalists from some or all of its content rules while publicly claiming that its more than three billion users are given an equal platform.

The programme, known as “cross check” or “XCheck”, shields millions of VIP users from the company’s guidelines and rules around what content may be removed, the WSJ reported.

Revelations from internal documents describing Facebook’s research on the impact of Instagram, published on Tuesday by the WSJ, appear to be the deepest dive yet into what the tech giant knows about its impact on teens’ mental health and reveals a gap between Facebook’s understanding of itself and what it reveals to the public.

More than 40 percent of Instagram’s users are 22 years old and younger [File: Thomas White/Reuters]

Among teens who reported thinking about suicide, 13 percent of British users and 6 percent of American users traced the desire to take their own lives to Instagram, the WSJ reported after seeing one of the presentation slides.

More than 40 percent of Instagram’s users are 22 years old and younger.

Some 22 million teens log onto Instagram in the United States each day, which is a lot higher than the five million teens signing onto Facebook.

For Facebook, which paid $1bn for Instagram in 2012, expanding its base of young users has been crucial in recent years as fewer and fewer young users turn to Facebook for their social media needs, show the materials seen by the WSJ.

“The research that we’ve seen is that using social apps to connect with other people can have positive mental-health benefits,” CEO Mark Zuckerberg told a congressional hearing back March, when lawmakers probed him about children and mental health.

Then in May, Instagram chief Adam Mosseri said that research suggests the app’s effects on teen mental health are “quite small”.

The dive into Instagram’s impact is made up of focus groups, diary studies and surveys of tens of thousands of people. In five presentations over 18 months, researchers found that some of the problems were specific to Instagram, and not social media in general, according to the WSJ.Unlike other apps that are grounded in performance or silly filters, Instagram focuses on the body and lifestyle, which Facebook research found is detrimental to young girls’ self-esteem and mental health [File: Jon Nazca/Reuters]

“Social comparison is worse on Instagram,” states Facebook’s research, referring to the tendency of users to compare themselves to others posting on the site.

While other apps such as TikTok, a short-video app, are grounded in performance, Instagram focuses on the body and lifestyle. The pressure to look perfect and have an ideal way of life could send teens spiralling towards eating disorders and depression, internal research found.

“Aspects of Instagram exacerbate each other to create a perfect storm,” the research said.

Facebook’s findings were reviewed by the company’s executives and mentioned to Zuckerberg in 2020, according to the documents seen by the WSJ.

But when asked last March by the lawmakers about the impact of Instagram on young people, Zuckerberg defended the company’s plan to launch an Instagram product for kids under 13.

“I believe the answer is ‘yes’,” Zuckerberg said in front of the congressional committee when asked if the company had done research on Instagram’s effects on children.

And when several senators in August asked Facebook to send them their internal findings on the impact of Instagram on youth mental health, Facebook sent a six-page letter but did not include the company’s research.SOURCE: AL JAZEERAhttps://www.aljazeera.com/economy/2021/9/14/facebook-knows-instagram-is-harmful-to-teen-girls-wsj

ARE SECULAR QUALIFIED DOCTORS CONSIDERED AS ISLAMIC HEALERS?

  • A response to a misleading Hadith interpretation going around on social media.
  • The addition of the words in brackets “a doctor/medical practitioner” is not part of the original Hadith… it’s just an assumption based on someone’s interpretation.

Below is the Hadith going around with the misleading addition:

Amr bin Shoaib narrates from his father, who narrates from his grandfather, that Nabee صلى الله عليه وسلم said:

Whoever gives medical treatment and he is not known to be [a doctor/medical practitioner] then he is liable.

(Sunan Nasai; Al Mujtaba, Hadith: 4830, Sunan Ibn Majah, Hadith: 3466, Sunan Daraqutni, Hadith: 4497)

The addition of the words in brackets “a doctor/medical practitioner” gives unsuspecting readers the assumption that secular indoctrinated doctors and medical practitioners are considered as the people that the Hadith are referring to. This is not true as there are many reasons why graduates of secular medical schools should not be considered as people of knowledge when it comes to health matters. Below are just some of the reasons:

  • Secular medical schools promotes the beliefs of the secular state which contradicts many Islamic beliefs.
  • Health effects of spiritual problems (evil eye, black magic and jinns) are not taught to students in medical schools but are mislabeled and passed off as other health conditions….as per the Hadith doctors will be held liable for this misdiagnoses.
  • Students at secular medical schools are not taught about how to use natural cures from the Quran and Sunnah to treat patients….as per the Hadith doctors will be held liable for been ignorant of this.
  • Students at secular medical schools are not taught that sins can also be a cause of sickness….science cannot explain all causes of sickness as it has limitations.
  • Students at secular medical schools are not taught about other Islamic treatments like repentance, sadaqah, supplication and duas…..this explains their incorrect belief on incurable diseases, which Islam teaches us can be cured using divine interventions…..as per the Hadith doctors will be held liable for this ignorance.
  • Students at secular medical schools are taught the incorrect beliefs on fever, sneezing, detox symptoms, sickness and contagious diseases….as per the Hadith doctors will be held liable for this misinformation that they promote to their patients.
  • students at secular medical schools are brainwashed into taking scientific evidence over Islamic evidence and mislead the muslim ummah in the process by propagating fake promoted science when real science(which is censored) are in line with Islamic beliefs.
  • Students at secular medical schools are brainwashed into believing that there are no better/safer alternative treatments than the allopathic treatments that they are indoctrinated into believing…. according to the Hadith they will be held liable for the harmful effects that these allopathic treatments cause.
  • Why didn’t they include the words like Hakeems, Raaqis, Aamils and Hijamah therapists in brackets? It’s clear that secular practitioners are been promoted over Islamic practitioners to indoctrinate unsuspecting Muslims into secularism by using secular titles in brackets.

-The title of doctor itself is an academic title and not an Islamic title…doctor is actually a Latin word and later a French one, meaning anyone who’s a teacher – usually of law, theology, philosophy, as well as medicine for a learned profession. So the really precise way to call for healing of sickness would be to ask for a practitioner that heals patients according to Islamic standards.

  • Based on the above secular trained medical practitioners are untrained, unqualified and unfit to practice medicine and healing according to Islamic standards. Secular indoctrinated Muslim health practitioners need to acknowledge the deficiency in knowledge that they are operating with and should make sincere attempts to get a real education according to Islamic standards as they will be held liable for whatever harm that they are causing to their unsuspecting patients. If an unqualified person physically treats a patient or operates on him and this leads to his death, then he will be held liable to pay the blood money. This is aside from him being liable in the court of Allah!

This is also a good response to ignorant people who like to use the words “ARE YOU A DOCTOR?” when you question or challenge the views and beliefs of doctors on health matters. Just because the secularists promotes the beliefs of doctors and scientists using various tools of propaganda it does not mean that they are considered as Islamic healers according to Islamic standards. Many doctors have good intentions of helping patients but they have been given a license by the secularists to harm people due to their indoctrination in unislamic beliefs.

It is advisable for Muslims to promote legitimate Islamic healers instead of promoting doctors. Be cautious of getting information on health matters from pro secular sources like mainstream media, the secular state, the WHO, Muslim doctors and the misguided scholars who align themselves with those who promote secular beliefs over Islamic beliefs. Don’t expect secularists to promote Islamic beliefs on their secular platforms as those platforms are used to promote their beliefs instead. Muslims need to make an effort to get their health information from alternative sources if they want to improve their health.

Another serious issue is that nowadays Muslim radio stations, Muslim newspapers and Muslim television programs are giving secular indoctrinated Muslim health practitioners a platform to promote their unislamic beliefs on the unsuspecting Muslim ummah….be cautious of them as ignorance is one thing but never forget that some Muslims are agents of the kuffar.

Bursting the Bubble​

As exhausted as she was, she put in the extra effort. “Never mind if I’m tired, I’ll do it for my hubby,” she thought to herself. She wore attractive clothing and jewellery, applied perfume, prepared his favourite meal and dessert and even lit candles, hoping to please her husband by making it a ‘special evening’. Sadly, as soon as he entered, let alone appreciate and admire, and let alone a simple smile and a hug – he didn’t even spare her a second glance! He walked in, glued to his phone, absolutely oblivious to the loving wife who had eagerly awaited him all day. At that moment, her bubble burst and her heart was broken…

After reading the above, most people would be quick to condemn the husband’s behaviour and classify him as insensitive, callous and uncaring. Now, consider the following:

“Mommy! You know what aapa told us today?” Faatimah excitedly exclaimed as she ran in from madrasah. “Not now Faatimah! I’m busy!” her mother snapped while frantically typing on her phone.

“Daddy! See what I made for you with my blocks!” Muhammad said, hopping with happiness. “Can’t you see that I’m on the phone?” his father scolded in irritation.

In all the cases above, a person turned to someone that they love, hoping and expecting to receive warmth, love, attention and acceptance, and were instead brushed off abruptly and painfully ignored. Just as a wife feels hurt when her husband treats her indifferently, children similarly feel hurt when their parents treat them in this way. If the husband is guilty, the parents are also guilty and deserving of condemnation.

In such a child’s eyes, his parents love their phones more than him as they cannot even put it down for a few minutes to give him attention and love. When the child sees that his parents have bonded with their phones more than with him, it is unsurprising that he develops a fascination with the phone and also wishes to acquire one to bond with. If it is not the phone occupying the parents, then regardless of what it is, it causes hurt and pain to the child – especially when it happens on a continuous basis.

As fathers and mothers, we need to understand that parenting is not an eight-to-five occupation where we can knock off for the day, thereafter ignoring all responsibilities of the work place until the next morning. As parents, we can never feel, “I gave my children enough attention today, now it’s my turn to relax and I do not want them to disturb me or bother me.” We are on duty 24/7, and whenever our children come to us, we must show them warmth, love and attention. Failing to do so creates a serious complex in the child, affecting their emotional wellbeing and causing them to develop a dangerous craving for attention.

When the wife is displeased with her husband for ignoring her, then due to her intelligence and age, she will be able to express herself with words or even tears. In the case of the child, he does not know how to communicate his need via words. Instead, when he desperately craves the attention and love of his parents, he looks for other ways to gain it – or he will seek the love from outsiders.

Children are simple souls and do not understand diplomacy and tact. If a child wants a toy from another child, he will often snatch it without thinking twice. Likewise, when the parents do not give the child the attention that he wants, he tries to ‘snatch’ it from them. This often manifests in the form of naughty behaviour such as breaking things, tantrums, etc., as the child knows no other way to draw his parents’ attention. 

How sad that the child has to resort to this behaviour simply to make his parents look at him!

Unfortunately, this plan backfires. The child is given attention – but in the form of scolding, punishment, etc., and this further entrenches the complex and craving within the child. The parents then lament and complain about the behaviour of their children, failing to realise that it is actually a shout for help from a child who is starving for love and knows no other way to express himself.

The next time our child comes to us, even if it may be to show us a flower they picked in the garden, or a ‘picture’ that they scribbled with crayons, or to tell us something silly that their friend told them, or to show us their toy, let us not burst their bubble and break their hearts. Let us take out a few moments to give them our undivided love and attention. 

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How You Can Help Regulate Your Child’s Access to Smartphones & Social Media

Thousands of testimonies which highlight the prevalence of sexual abuse experienced by young girls have been posted on a website called Everyone’s Invited. The shocking number of testimonies has triggered an Ofsted review, which aims at introducing more protective policies and improving the experiences of females in educational institutions.
The findings of the review were published in a report by Ofsted on 10 June,[1] which immediately shocked many parents, caregivers, and teachers. The revelations shed light on the high levels of sexual abuse and harassment which occur within educational facilities. According to Ofsted’s findings, girls in one school were asked for up to ten nude or semi-nude pictures per night by different boys. The report highlights the alarming problem of inappropriate sexual behaviour among children in schools.

In light of this issue, parents are naturally concerned about how they can protect their child from being abused, as well as preventing them from abusing others.

While the source of the abuse and harassment boils down to the education, upbringing, values, and mentalities of young boys, what also cannot be ignored are the tools which facilitate the exponential growth of these cycles of sexual misconduct. The prevalent use of smartphones and social media platforms by almost every teenager in the present has provided abusers open access into the lives of thousands of children. If this vicious cycle is not stopped, then the impact will be felt for generations to come.

These abuse cases stem from the unfettered access to social media platforms that children in the present have. Surprisingly, almost every child in the present age has unrestricted possession of a smartphone device. If the frequency of abuse cases is to be mitigated, access to smartphone devices must be restricted. Since every child and family is different, we should be open to adapting our approach for every unique situation. Parents with younger children are in a better position to tackle this situation more efficiently. But even for the parents of older children, imposing clear rules and boundaries may be the only way to prevent episodes of abuse from occurring on social media platforms.

In this article, I will outline the advice I often give to parents regarding the use of smartphones and social media.

1. Do not give your child a smartphone

Refusing to give your child a smartphone is not due to a lack of trust, but about giving them the right things at the right age. If a parent were to give their child a bottle of alcohol and permit them to play with it, do you think the child would not end up opening the bottle and drinking from it? Would we be surprised if the child ultimately ended up becoming addicted to the substance? Similarly, a smartphone can be a dangerous tool if placed in the wrong hands. If such devices are used improperly, a person can face numerous complications related to mental health, such as severe anxiety or depression.

Inform your child that they can have a smartphone when they turn 16, that is, once they start college or their senior years in secondary school. In the years before they turn 16, ensure that you educate your child regarding the benefits and harms of smartphones and social media. Educate them about the values of right and wrong, so that the process of learning and understanding becomes easier for them. You must also consider the fact that a child learns from what they see. Therefore, you must be a positive model by exhibiting the best behaviour with your smartphone and social media usage. If you are using these applications to the extent that they are taking over your life, your child will not value your advice and rules.

Owing to your strict guidelines, your child may feel like an outcast by being the only primary student who does not have a smartphone. In response to such concerns, you should educate your child by informing them that it is perfectly fine to uphold different values and standards. Inspire them by saying that we should be leaders, not blind followers of others. Remind them that during the technological age, it is extremely dangerous to obey others without thinking about the values of right and wrong.

2. If a phone is required, then consider giving a technologically inferior model

If you need to give your child a phone due to health and safety reasons, such as their school being located far away from their area of residence, then give them a technologically inferior device. By such a phrase I am referring to older phone models which do not have any smartphone capabilities.

This will enable your child to contact you in case of an emergency, yet they will not be able to have access to any smartphone features.

3. If a smartphone is required, then do not give it to ages under 11

If for whatever reason you feel that your child requires a smartphone, then do not give it to a child of primary school age. Only provide the smartphone when they are 11 years of age or older. The phone should not be under contract, and have no data plan. This way your child will only be able to access the Internet or mobile applications when they are in Wi-Fi zones. In addition to these measures, instruction about the appropriate use of smartphones is still necessary, and ideally, your child should not have any social media applications installed. Bear in mind that most social media applications are designated for the ages of 13 and older. You should also ensure that your child submits their phone to you whenever they arrive home, enabling you to maintain control of their device.

4. Regulate their time

If you wish to give your child some time to use their phone at home, it must be regulated. For example, they could be permitted one hour of phone usage straight after dinner. However, the use of the phone must be in communal areas to ensure nothing inappropriate is occurring. Under no circumstances should any technological devices enter the bedroom. After they have indulged themselves with the smartphone, they should hand the device over to you. It is also important that as a child’s first teacher, you must also appropriately manage your device usage. For instance, if your child is not using their phone at home, then you as a parent should also model that behaviour and try to avoid phone usage during after school hours. Instead, use it in the evening after your child has gone to bed, if possible.

5. Use limits and preventive measures

If you have agreed to let your child use some social media applications, then a few limits and preventative measures must be put in place. These include the following:

  1. Add a parent or guardian as a contact,
  2. Only add friends and family members approved by parents,
  3. Do not add acquaintances of the opposite gender,
  4. Do not allow your child to set their profile page as private.

This is still not the best option, but at least there will be some rules and regulations in place. These measures will mitigate the potential harm that your child may encounter during their use of social media.

6. No phone at night

Under no circumstances should you allow your child to have their phone with them during the night. It must be taken from them before bed, as this is a time of greater risk. In fact, studies confirm that most cases of harassment and cyberbullying take place at night, and most girls are asked for nude or semi-nude photographs during overnight hours. No child should ever be allowed to take a smartphone with them to bed. It is therefore essential that the bedroom remains a technology-free zone, and it is your duty as a parent to maintain checks and balances on your child’s night time activities.

7. Put parental controls on your Wi-Fi

Unfettered access to the internet contributes to the abuse and harassment of children. To combat this, there are a number of services that parents can utilize to help put filters on their home Internet network. Through these simple measures you can protect your child from accessing harmful content and other potential risk areas.

While we may face pressure from our children on these matters, we must nevertheless be mindful that as parents we assume the obligation of protecting our children and raising them up with good values. Smartphone devices and social media platforms are not age appropriate forums for children, even if the current degree of restrictions worldwide is limited. Besides the requirement of them having to reach mature age, you must provide your child with sufficient know-how regarding the advantages and liabilities found in modern technology. When a child realises that your rules come from a coherent value system which is designed to make them a better person, they will be more inclined to abide by your commands. This way, as parents we will face a lower degree of friction and ensure to safeguard our future generations.

I have been working with Parents, Carers and Schools to help cover difficult sensitive topics, with a view of helping to improve safeguarding.

Last year I published the second book part of the ‘Difficult Conversation Series’ and addresses several safeguarding topics.

‘Let’s chat about your body & privacy’ uses relatable scenarios and discusses issues around body safety, exposure to indecent images (pornography), and sharing of images via social media (sexting).

There are several thinking points in the book which encourage discussion and problem-solving. This book helps children, parents, and teachers to explore difficult situations and conversations in a child-friendly and sensitive way.

The book is designed for pre-teens and early teens (marked as suitable for children aged 10+) and helps prepare children for Secondary School and the teenage years.

The book is available to purchase on Amazon here

Source: www.islam21c.com

Notes:

[1] https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/review-of-sexual-abuse-in-schools-and-colleges/review-of-sexual-abuse-in-schools-and-colleges#what-did-we-find-out-about-the-scale-and-nature-of-sexual-abuse-in-schools