the points listed below were sent to me from the majlis ulama south africa after my nikah in 1997.

1. Sexual intercourse in the anus is haraam.
2. Sexual intercourse during the state of haidh is haraam.
3. It is preferable to be covered with a blanket or sheet when indulging in sex. Total nudity, although not sinful, is discouraged in the hadith.
4. During the sexual act abstain from speaking.
5. While indulging in sex with one’s wife it is haraam to think of another woman.
6. Sex should not be indulged in immediately after having eaten. Wait for about two hours. It is harmful for the health to engage in sex on a full stomach.
7. During the state of haidh it is not permissible to touch or even look at that part of the wife’s body which is between the navel and the knees.
8. If the wife’s monthly haidh period is less than ten days, then it will not be permissible to engage in sex immediately when her period ends. It is necessary to wait for her to take ghusl or at least one full salaat time passing.
9. If after having had sex once, the husband wants to have sex the second time the same night, he must wash his private part and so should the wife. It is not permissible to engage in sex the second time without having washed the private part.
10. It is preferable to take ghusl immediately after having had sex. But, this is not compulsory. It is not good to sleep the whole night in the state of impurity. The angels of mercy do not remain with one who is in the state of janaabat.
11. When about to indulge in sex, recite the relevant dua which could be found in almost every dua kitaab.
12. When about to reach climax recite the relevant dua in the mind without lip movement.
13. Oral sex is not permissible.
14. The husband can approach his wife during sex from any angle provided that he does not have sex in the anus.
15. One should not indulge in sex at such a time which will bring about qadha of salaat or missing of the jamaat salaat.
16. The husband should take into consideration the health of the wife and not indulge in excessive sex. Excessive sex is harmful physically as well as spiritually.
17. During the wife’s haidh period, if the husband is craving for sex, it is permissible for him to find relief by his wife masturbating him. Self-masturbation is not permissible.